Run, Rabbit, Run!

RunningI’ll let you in on a little secret – I HATE running. The list of things I would rather be doing in the world other than running is long enough to reach from here to California and back and yet I find myself longing for that breathless, aching feeling again. I’m not talking jogging or even running at a moderate pace, I’m talking running so fast that if you misstep for just a second on the treadmill then you’d win the grand prize on America’s Funniest Videos.

When I began losing my weight I did everything I could to avoid running. I walked on the treadmill, I became best friends with the elliptical, I even did the stepper but God forbid I attempt to run. The reason for avoidance is two part, firstly it hurts to run, it drains every ounce of energy I have and all the will power in the world to do it. Secondly, remember that episode of Friends where Phoebe runs and looks like a flailing drowning fool? Well that’s how I run. Somewhere along the way though my best friend Queen Bee convinced me that running was good for me, that I would enjoy that rush of adrenaline and she was right.

I am a swimmer by nature, sure I sprinted the 100 meters in school and even ran a few relays but my heart was always in the pool. I tried swimming in Gold’s Gym’s pool and had found my paradise until their attendant dumped a bucket of chlorine on top of me while I swam. I haven’t been back there since. The closest I can come to that rush of swimming is running, not that moment when you start, when you have to will yourself to put one foot in front of the other rather quickly lest you fly off the end of the treadmill, but that part where you have two minutes left to go and you’re dripping with sweat and your heart is bursting from your chest. That moment when you know that you did it.

While I can’t find the solitude and peace that I find in the water with a treadmill I can find that moment when everything slips away and complete euphoria and exhaustion clash. There is no better anti-depressant than an exhausting, “don’t wanna do it but I will anyway” run on the treadmill. Now if only I could remember this first thing on a Monday morning I might actually push myself to run this week rather than settle for the elliptical parked in front of the movie theater screen.

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